Nice one Quintrex.
Just remembered this old chestnut:
Three mates, one Scottish, one Irish and one English were flying over a remote jungle region of Papua New Guinea. Their plane developed engine trouble and they were forced to crash land.
They were, to their surprise, all unhurt and after getting their bearings decided to head for the nearest stream or river, as it would surely lead them downstream and out of the jungle.
They had only walked a short distance when they heard a loud “al-lalama, al-lalama” chanting sound and suddenly became surrounded by a tribe of Indians who overwhelmed them, hog-tied them to branches and carried them off to their camp, chanting “al-lalama” all the way.
After a long trek they arrived at the tribes camp, the tribesmen chanted “Lalama, lalama, lalama” and the big chief appeared. He approached the three men and said to the Irishman,
“You man, you have two choice, first choice Death! Second choice Bimbo!
What your choice?”
Well, the Irishman looked at his mates, who shrugged their shoulders, so, scared and not wanting to die, he said,
“I choose Bimbo!”
The whole tribe started to chant “Bimbo, bimbo, bimbo, bimbo” and it got louder as they stripped and tied the Irishman to the ceremonial log.
“Bimbo, bimbo, bimbo” the chant continued as twenty of the tribesmen removed their thongs and proceeded to shag the Irishman, his two mates looked on in horror as he began to scream. When all twenty had finished they untied him and he collapsed on the floor, moaning.
The big chief then approached the Scotsman and said,
“You man, you have two choice, first choice Death! Second choice Bimbo!
What your choice?”
He had seen what happened to his Irish friend and was horrified but at least he was still alive, he thought, so, shrugging his shoulders to his English mate he said,
“I choose Bimbo too!”
Well, once again the whole tribe started to chant “Bimbo, bimbo, bimbo, bimbo” and it got louder and louder as they stripped and tied the Scotsman to the ceremonial log.
“Bimbo, bimbo, bimbo” the chant continued again as twenty of the tribesmen removed their thongs and proceeded to shag the Scotsman, while his English mate looked on in absolute horror and disgust as he began to scream. When all twenty had finished they untied him and he collapsed on the floor, moaning and crying but still alive.
The big chief then finally approached the Englishman and said, (you know)
“You man, you have two choice, first choice Death! Second choice Bimbo!
What your choice?”
Well, the Englishman is from a very privileged family and remaining proud he decides that, after seeing what has happened to his mates, he is not going to let himself be violated in the same fashion, so he says to the chief,
“I will not give you the satisfaction of degrading me, I will choose Death!”
Well, the whole tribe starts to run around excitedly as they begin to chant,
“Death! Death! Death! Death! Death!
Death by Bimbo! Death by Bimbo!”
